endings and start-ups

when you're young
the stars twinkle like a clown
when you're old and lame
the song has lost its flair

you cannot hear
you cannot see
you cannot smell
the breezes of the sea

when you're wrinkled
when you're stooped
you can't enjoy the view
of the ocean near you

you can't tell the colors
of that passing rainbow
you can't smell the scent
of the flowers near the bayou

time, old age is not a kick
it's not a cake that you can eat
for it has lost its taste
when your taste buds are dead

as there is dawn
there is the night
as there are newborns
there are lolas and lolos

as the curtain opens in a play
the actors begin to imitate you and me
but as we approach the end
the curtain falls, the end will rule the day

endings, beginnings, life, death
it's a cycle we can't dodge or forget
for it will get us as the time ticks
as the sun sets, as the moon wanes...

sad isn't it :?...

the iconic kiss that marked the end of WW2

 

the iconic kiss at time's square new york and a copy of it forever memorialized in san diego california, the base of 1/3rd of america's military force. taken at the end of world war 2, sailors were coming home and in jubilation they just kiss whoever they could hold onto in the streets ;0... you would think that this pair were sweethearts but no. i just watched it today in the history channel that these 2 do not even know each other personally. there was a campaign to find who they were. after 30 years one woman came out and claimed that she was the nurse in this pic. but lab analysis proved that it is not true. then another one claimed that she was the one and the lab analysis proved her right. so the search went on to find the sailor. one man claimed that he was the one but another one sued and the lab analysis showed that the second one who sued was the real one and his wife was even caught in this pic, laughs. oh well.

the long and winding road of life...

when did it begun
and when will it end
our spiritual journey
of mostly the unknown
the untapped, destiny of where

as the buzz of the bees will tell
in the passing of the wind
often misheard and ignored
life as we all know
is a mystery to behold

what is real is the sun
it will shine and then it sits
only to come back again
as the time unwinds
as the clock moves its hands

while we close our eyes
as the moon and the stars
will go farther and
farther from our grasp
only to hide in the darkest abyss of time

when the days and the years
will eventually move and roll
once they're here soon they'll depart
never to come back again into our lives
even if you beg for only one more chance

like experiences
and the people that we've met
all will turn into memories
that are hard
or easy to forget...

my roses... from red then they turn into pink. beaten by the rain lately but still they look pretty. roses are the flowers of the blessed virgin mary... and i'd like to own a house like the one "from up on poppy hill" an animated gorgeous japanese movie. the almost perfect site because i think it is up on a hill and quite a distance to the beach. i don't want just a view of the ocean. i want the beach and the ocean just a few steps from my house. yup i can dream. sometimes dreams will come true, it happened to me already :) one more time won't hurt, really...(^&*)...

what's keeping progress

"If you do not go after what you want, you’ll never have it. If you do not ask, the answer will always be no. If you do not step forward, you’ll always be in the same place"... anonymous...

so make a move, a dance move that is :> ... because life is about happiness, always. it is a lie if someone will say that they prefer loneliness ;) dance is an interpretation of life. life is a dance to find happiness. it is a very complicated road. but you are on the right track if you think that life is to find happiness. hmn, john travolta is not happy these days because of some gay revelations that might end up losing his wife. poor john, i wish him happiness and good luck :) true again, lots of money can't lead to perfect bliss or happiness. one of the lessons of our lives...

the bible says in matthew 7: 1-5... “Judge not, that you be not judged. For with the judgment you pronounce you will be judged, and with the measure you use it will be measured to you. Why do you see the speck that is in your brother's eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when there is the log in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother's eye"

so either you are straight, gay, lesbian or both, nobody should judge you for it's not any one's job to do that except God. in other words it is not our business. live and let live. accept all kinds of people whatever gender preferences they may have. life is short. there are other better things to do than judging our co-humans. one better thing to do is... chasing happiness for one :)

another john travolta dance. same music, different partner. but the same john travolta, only younger :)



the search for happiness is an unending chore
you've lost before and you did thread more
climbed tall mountains, swam ocean's floor
but still happiness is nowhere on board

you've looked around in every world's corner
met wondrous people, fun animals' galore
where is that joy, you have to pause
up there on the cross, dead but risen...

...and that is our Lord :)

sunset of my native land

once a bright and sunny sky
now gone and hidden away
once a vibrant distant umbrella
now closed and can't be used

horizons of change
in every passing moment
like a breath of fresh air
now stale and can't be inhaled

glorious filled grandeur
a symphony galore
slowly easing away
moving out from your nose

swallowed by the dark
hugged by the night
the twinkling stars emerged
and the moon is smiling at us

changes in nature
changes in life
silent goodbyes
silent acceptance

because tomorrow
comes another sunrise
then another glorious sunset
will be in store for us...

i snapped this image with a canon camera inside a moving vehicle maybe traveling around 65 miles per hour en route back to manila from the province, one pinas vacation. i am always looking forward going to the province because of the loads of fresh air, lush greenery and the most beautiful beaches there :) this image makes me homesick more... there is this south korean oceana airliner a boeing 777 that crash landed in san francisco international airport recently killing 2 chinese teens and injuring lots of passengers. a survivable airplane crash but even then you feel sad for those involved. it must have been a horrific experience for all of them. we pray for their early recovery both mentally and physically. even how safe aviation is nowadays, accident happens... it's been a year since our pinas vacation. days just went so fast. there are things that makes you happy and one of them top in my list is my native land, then the beach, my family and friends. i do not have much friends, true friends that is for i can count my fingers, 10 of them and there are lots of vacancy, laughs. i will miss jeanna, my nurse co-worker who is moving to florida with her husband. she brought me a nice reddish-pinkish rosary from the vatican last fall from galleria aurora in rome. see, even i am not in rome yet, i have something that came from rome already, thanks jeanna :) every time i look at it, it makes me smile :> my happiness is very simple. i wonder if there is such thing as a blogging sunset, hmn...

the cupid shuffle dance, let's see it and have some fun. this dance is for everyone to participate, young or old, even done on special occasions ;>... in love or not...(^&*)... it is not perfect but it is fun just the same and i am only an spectator via you tube. now imagine if you are the one dancing it, laughs. do it for maybe cupid will stick around and shoot an arrow into the air aiming at you ;?

sunsets & sunrises

 

belated 115th b-day philippines and happy 237th b-day america :) so not only humans celebrate b-days, even countries do but we call that more appropriately as celebrating its freedom or gained independence... above art the lower one is "impression of the sun" by betsy westendorp. the art above, artist is unknown. sunrises and sunsets are nature's way of waking up and going to sleep, or in humans, it's our death and birth...(^&*)...

sunsets and sunrises...

old age, golden years
young once
a babe

spring time
summertime
then fall

winter comes
quiet blooms
silence

sunrises, sunsets
dark, the moon
shines

dawn, the rooster
sings, light
the sun beams

daylight is here again
sunrise then sunset
that's life

live, laugh
leave, depart
death

even then
sunrises and sunsets
always repeat itself

for the new, the young
that we were then
yesterday...

all of us are in this predicament. just others think of the future while others don't. the young continually thinks that they will stay young forever. they often use their youth to despise the old. but the truth is all of us will go through old age, at least it is planned that way. but our Father up above only knows if you and me or all of us will have that privilege to be in these twilight years... but we can hope and pray :) and speaking of pictures, the camera could make you pretty or ugly, fat or thin, younger or older, laughs. cameras sometimes are not reliable, so that's why photo shop exists ;? i sure need that service, laughs. oh well.

a prodigy

an amazing wonderful young piano player. there are geniuses, gifted humans with exceptional talents out there and you tube captures them for eternity... JC is a good piano player too :) he was first place 3x in his recital, that was when he was 7-8-9 years old. i wasn't into camera recording yet then so it was not captured, so those were memories just gone by. his piano lessons paid for he played in our church bell choir for years for he could read musical notes and father chateau our parish priest even gave him a good referral letter for his college entrance :)

memories just gone by...

bachs, brahms, beethovens
nostalgic clicks of the ivories
made by magical beats
tones, tunes, melodies
boring into your inner soul
wrapped in warmth filled air

sun, stars, galaxies far away
would be in your dreams
if you can catch them
day by day passes
your journey jostles on
leaving prints etched by your foot

you travel, sleep, wake up
time ticks away, fades away
left are daunting memories
in your mind, in your camera
in your dreams of what was
what could have beens, what

what may have beens
unanswered, unfinished dreams
but you're gone as time left
with the sun shining with it
your hands in the air catching up
did you have it or not...

nostalgia, francis goya...

nostalgia

when it's lost
you wish and yearn for it to come back
all is left are bitter sweet memories
the joys, the laughter, the smiles and the tears

hanging out at the beach
holding and rubbing hands
walking slowly, edging towards eternity
for awhile you thought you're on to forever

the sunsets, the sunrises, the waves
they're not the signs of goodbye
they're not there to depart from your sight
you held on tighter and tighter never to let go

but suddenly you've realized
you've been only just dreaming
your mind is foggy, unreal
it is just you, lost in the reverie of a lifetime

it never happened, it wasn't there
just creations in your brain
unstable, illusions, a mirage
never a reality, a fake and a farce...

********

so many instrumental melodies
so little time to spare
few precious moments to spend
a spanish lullaby is the name of the game :)

now that is the flower that i can buy painted. the color, the brush strokes are just right. beautiful as the first melody. now i can go on my blogging sunset ;) i dunno... the spanish people are close to my heart and so their music as well :) music is very generational, it may or may not break boundaries. nostalgia, a wonderful instrumental classic by francis goya. you've heard tons of beats before but there is always one or two that  just stood out in your memories and ears. one complete melody, masterfully executed with perfect notes...

         

the art of music and women...

smooth and evocative
beautiful and sublime
music and women
are partners in life

melancholy and sad
how many secrets
are kept in your soulful eyes
and burning hearts

different colors
different smiles
different moments
different times

women, music
captivating in a pause
caught in flesh
and wrapped in lullabies

women and music
are creations that make
the masculine world
live, love and be inspired...

life is a blank canvas, grand rapids, michigan

life is a blank canvas
it begins with a helpless cry
life is a wave of the ocean
slowly moving on one by one

sometimes a storm comes
the hurricanes, the floods
other times the peaceful sky
hovers above us with a smile

the trees, the surfs, the breeze
no stress here by the beach
as the rat race is taking place
at somewhere else's universe

we are all painters
of our days on earth
tints of black or bright colors
continually adorn our lives

pure and simple
or elaborate decor
quiet and pure
absence of turmoil

tho' every now and then
dark clouds pass the dunes
your easel tremble
as it moves it needs support

the brush strokes of life
begins again after the rain
it continues to draw
evading heartaches to grow...

kundimans of the past

i love churches, just sad that several of them in metro manila was destroyed during the war... and kudos to those who has grit to accept reality. hard as it may seem one can't live in pretense for long. the truth always has its way to be known like the love life of one popular comedian and actress. if number 3 did not work, maybe the unknown yet no. 4 will do ;) tsk, love talaga. at first it brings happiness but as we all know love wanes like the moon as time moves on... but the moon will be back into full throttle in just a matter of days, same moon for there is only one moon in our planet earth. how about in humans, when love leaves, an empty heart is the result and it could only be filled with another love, right? believe me, it is a fact. love is replaced by another love. so it's not amorsolo ;) and this song here doesn't apply to all :) but when it applies, joy is the result :> cute song, i like it... i'm thinking it's like a period. a nice way to end a blog, mine :) maybe...

flowers are love and joy :)

 

 

after the tulips come my flower balls. another flower fireworks in bloom :)

when you are sad and blue
here's a flower for you
when you are sick and weak
a flower is what you need
to accompany your meds
when you march on that aisle
flowers are by your sides
and when you pray at church
you give it to the best
to God who created it
for thanks and as you ask
for more miracles of help :)

so flowers are very meaningful, the source of love and joy :> as people give them to their love ones dead or alive ...(^&*)... and yes, pink and purple flower balls... and they are true flowers not fake yellow huge duck toys, laughs. oh well. kinda real versus illusions :) i like the yellow golden sun's color though, not gold coins for i am not really that materialistic to love golden moolahs but i do make exceptions, i love the gold in those not that expensive earrings and the yellow sunflower. but it's just colors. i even learned how to like a black kitty :)... but as we know colors sometimes are used as a morse code, true :) like hitting a lot of birds with one color ;) brilliant! laughs. oh well, again... so gals and guys be wise for there are players around :) you've thought that it's you but think again. but when your name is mentioned then that is a different story for it's true, you are the yellow :) just some fun stuffs, but really colors make our bland world go alive...

against all odds... one is amazed when contrary to what is expected one became victorious in life. a good example is president obama's life and maybe yours as well. did you expect to beat the odds against you and you ended up with victory :) well, you did not do it by yourself. there is a God that helped you get there. let's not ever forget that... when you think you did it by yourself there is a major flaw in that belief for the truth is nothing ever happens without God's will either positive or negative. truths are hidden in the reasons why things happen for the bad or for the good. that is why we are just humans. our comprehension is very limited. we wonder why things happen, but God for sure knows why...

our beautiful world, pass it on

http://www.values.com/inspirational-stories-tv-spots/122-Annie-s-Song

values

it might be that rushing river
in a cascading water canyon

it might be that lofty mountain
with green covered forest terrain

it might be that lasting love
that no rain could ever wash

or it might be those soft whispers
that melt dark coated hearts

whatever it is pass it on
our beautiful world that we own

beautiful nature, beautiful souls
with values better than golden coins...

a boat without a name

what will i call you as i paddle you out to sea
a name that might be there for all of them to see
shall i paint a pink bow and a sun over looking thee
or a sea horse swimming silently all alone in serenity

what will i jot down in my fading memory
that you once took me down in the depths of eternity
as i was lost and hidden under seaweeds' clutch
as they danced with the swirl of the current around

then you let me play with the wind
as i chose to watch the seagulls soar
and hope for another journey soon
as i look faraway beyond

that will make me forget the days
filled with burning agonies
that will make me laugh at life
that is testing my sanity

what will i call you now
that you've done a lot for me
my sunshine, my wooden camp, my sailing car
my hidden sea horse or my paradise on water and on land...

the art is by john singer sargent :) and this poem? was written 03-22-2010... one of my favorite created string of words :>

somewhere in time, one timeless music :)

up north the memories lingered
the lakes, the water, the music
as the melodies played and danced
the cold fresh water kicked

at night the meteors fell
in showers against the dawning sky
here comes a new beginning
a fresh new start of life

a hope of sunny days ahead
a hope of no more rainy days
as a beloved boat is abandoned
left alone, goodbye past...

i thought it was a porsche but a camaro pala ;) again, when you buy expensive gifts for your honey for his love, that is a red flag and a sure sign to bid your honey goodbye. plus an abusive behaviour and violence, that is unacceptable. sad at first but i'm pretty sure that's the right road to take. move on :) for true love was not there in the first place. if you are used and abused, lied upon and taken advantage of, that is not love and we all know that...(^&*)... and of course love has proofs. one is he or she will acknowledge you to the world :)



"somewhere in time" an excerp of that timeless classic by the late superman actor christopher reeves and the beautiful jane seymour. one of the most beloved love story movie of all time :) great acting, great story, great actors and great music plus great movie location, my home state :) we couldn't asked for more. i watched this movie over and over again, it is ridiculously insane, laughs. i enjoyed it. it made me happy. 5 stars :> and the magnet drawing photo...

                         

what is the solution to the negative perception of manila by this inferno author who suggested in his da vinci code book about Jesus having a wife... maybe to flood mr. dan brown with our loads of very beautiful filipina muses, ala jane seymour :> that might do it...(^&*)... and the glory will go to the goddess :) who could eliminate or let him delete that manila horror in his recent inferno book, hey, we can try, right? ;) gosh!

the gates of hell is manila per american author dan brown. what was cited was extreme poverty, a lot of homeless people around, rampant prostitution, traffic, dirty streets, pollution and etc. what a sad commentary of our country. if you are born and lived in an advance first rate country for the rest of your life then the comparison is what you see first hand when you personally deal with life in a third world country. the problem here is the picture of the philippines is now mirrored in squalor, all of the country in general which is not true. this problem has existed long before dan brown. so who is to blame and what is the solution. sad to say without the active involvement of the government nothing will ever change. this kind of perception by foreigners like dan brown will continue without end. yes, it is true that this scenario exists in manila so what can we all do to stop it or how to fix it... maybe president aquino is listening. dan brown is an author. people read his book. and now parts of manila is exposed through his pen... and the problem is, manila is now the gates of hell according to his book. unfair, yes. but there is truth to it. the suffering of human kind is seen in the streets of manila. although not all streets but still the suffering is there and that is truly hell to these people involved. not you, not us, but them. when we try to see it as our problem and as our suffering, maybe there is a glimmer of hope or there will be change, but when, that is the question...

in other words...

i love you chevrolet impala :) this is a recent commercial of this GM made chevy classic, our car. my first car ever was a chevrolet camaro. a sport's car made by GM. who could have thought that i love sporty cars then, laughs. now i am more practical i go for safety which my beloved and gone 15 y/o chevy lumina was. a 5 star rated top notched car in safety rating that's why i was sold in buying it and it proved to be true because in my car crash for almost a year past now the lumina saved me. i just sustained a right painful leg which disappeared after a week. that airbag also was of great help. i am very blessed and very lucky :) thank God...

so i am for american made cars :) i live in america so i go for made in america products including cars to help the american work force plus american made cars are really good cars, no kidding. i am a living proof of it :> and the impala is used by the police as squad cars too, so it must be very good. the lumina was phased out by GM just like the camaro. but they revived the camaro a few years ago :) well, as a nurse i am glorified by many in my profession, thank you :) plus i can also buy cars because it is a must if you live in the U.S. so that you can get around easily. it is a necessity... (^&*)... and did you know that the "beast" president obama's limo is a General Motor's made car? this limo was even shipped in pinas when George Bush, the son, was president in his visit there. and GM was the top largest car manufacturer in the world for a long time but toyota had taken over since. but hey, i'll buy from the second largest car manufacturer anytime, i don't mind :>

yes, i am for cars with value... and speaking of value, when does love becomes valuable. as we know relationships turn sour. like the ai-ai case... it is just sad that when you thought you've found the one. that one is a fake pala, not the one that embodies love in the true sense of that word. not only her, kris, demi, the dra. love talaga is very elusive, like the search for glory in our lives...(^&*)... so forget love, laughs. oh well. and a red flag is when you buy your honey some expensive things to make him happy. it means that you are not enough for him so better leave and put a period in this relationship and start all over again to find true love. if you're lucky you'll find it but if not do not be disappointed. there are some others too that is in same situation like you do. it's not the end of the world :)

the wrath of nature is often deadly. tornadoes can suddenly change lives in an instant taking lives of humans just like that. let's pray for the victims and their families. only God's grace could heal their wounds. no amount of words can ease their pain and suffering. we feel their pain and loss. tomorrow is another day and the sun always shine behind those clouds. hope is eternal. hope for happiness and peace afterwards is all we got...

even a flower smiles :)

let us begin with a true smile. truth is my smiles are really true :) i try to give it for it's free and it is easy. just open your heart plus it makes it easier to smile too if your son is your photographer. thanks JC :) above image is a smiling powder puff taken from the web. thanks to you, owner :)  my blog flower just in inverted form. the flower of celebrations like a coming new year... even a flower smiles. i like powder puffs because they are like fireworks. the flower that I've never forgotten when i was young. as i looked up on that tree full of clustered powder puffs i was amazed then. so when i go to gardens i searched for it. i saw one in the grounds of "our lady of manaoag" church in bloom one philippine vacation in the past. for me powder puffs are the flower of celebrations because of their firework like form :)

summer tops

autumn, winter, spring
but i can't wait for summer
winter is too cold and icy
my toes are going numb

spring is when the birds chirp
and my small garden wakes up
my flowers start to bloom
that is happiness from my heart

fall is so spectacular
with its blinding colorful crayolas
set by the eyes of autumn
trees are dressed in gold, reds, it's a blast

but summertime is joy
it is warm like a hug
you can bike, dance and hike
that will be an awful exercise

four seasons of weather
four seasons of life
four seasons of travels
but summer is when the moon laughs...

i am a moon child being a cancerian. i love the water and summer is when i can enjoy that :) in giving smiles, you always get it back. you gave me a smile, thank you. but now i am giving it back to you, so we're even.

 2013 is the year of the snake and i am not a fan of snakes tho' i respect and fear them for their venom is deadly. will this year be a lucky one, only the future will tell :)

i'm thinking i've been blogging for 6 years now, sort of a mind exercise for me. i've reached my goal and achieved my purpose, so what is the reason to continue blogging. this is a private on line sort of a diary for me which a very few has access to. maybe he, she and their GF's or BF's, laughs. only those that knew it before or has been passed along to their acquaintances, my guess. maybe i can stay around still just to park some wanna be poems? maybe, that's a good reason :)

i will say goodbye now

do not think of the full moon
for that was me
do not think of the green valley
for it was me

do not think of the quiet morning
for i owned it
do not think of the rushing river
for i swam in it

think about the other planets
that you would never reach
think about the unending universe
for i am now living in it

think about the hot, sunny days
when i played in the yard
think about the short mornings
that you sent me out by the bus

think about my room filled with toys
that will be now untouched
give it all to the unfortunate kids
for now i am gone

remember me always
i know that you will
you won't forget me
i bet i will still be there

there with you
in every waking hours
there with you
in every Christmas celebrations

there with you till the end of time
not physically but in spirit
there with you to comfort you from now on
in every pain and in every hardships

i love you mom and dad
continue to live life as it was
i may not be there with a smile
but now i am with God...

to the parents who lost their children in senseless violence, we feel for them. it must be the worst pain ever. things happen for a reason and only God knows why...

here happiness is lost. but happiness will come again in just a matter of time... for happiness is man made and what we try to perceive it to be, so ergo it's just us, you're right :) but happiness is only there when truth, honesty dwell :) have a memorable spring, summer, fall or winter, rainy or sunny days everyone. thanks for your visits. i really do appreciate it :)

the color of the wind

the color of the wind never change
for it is none
it can never be defined, painted nor drawn
for it is none
it could never be stolen nor broken
nor could it be lied upon
for it never existed, it was never there
like illusions and fake loves

the color of the wind even if you chase it
you'll never have it
you'll never hold it in your palms or in your heart
you'll never be satisfied for it is a dish
that can't be cooked nor can be baked
the color of the wind is just like that
for it only existed in your imagination
and in your mind

the color of the wind is like a dream
that you've longed to have
but like the trillion stars that adorned the evening sky
it is impossible to catch
not unless the divine will get you there
the color of the wind you will never see
but if God stands by your side
the color of the wind will suddenly
appear in front of your eyes...

"always take the high road"

the ride might be bumpy and hard
filled with unpaved cement
gravel and sand

the stairs might be steep to climb
slippery, wobbly with unsettled
wood grains, undone

the path must be imperfect
with lots of thorny plants
that wounds your hands

but the high road leads to heaven
unending happiness without tears
without problems without pouts

what would you choose
except to suffer and just to bear it
for it's the way to smiles

after all the tears had been shed
after all the pains
had subsided and left

here you are with an enlightened heart
ready to rejoice and to celebrate
for you've won all the challenges

and the battles, the curve balls thrown at your life....

tulips and a lucky cat :)

from my garden... we've been feeding this homeless kitty since winter time. black is lucky in japan so we'll take that meaning :) what name shall we pick for you kitty? his eyes is jade green, hmn... love and acceptance mean jade...  so from now on your name is jade :> a favorite feng shui decor :) this cat is a fast eater. in 1 minute the whole can of fancy feast is gone. that is the morning meal and then in the evening are kibbles for dinner. our cat h. saya is picky. he'll eat half of his food and then come back later for the other half breakfast or dinner and no lunch btw to control h. saya's weight :) we give him cat treats for lunch :) isn't he or she a cutie? how can people just leave cats abandoned is just beyond me. it will take just a call to the humane society and they come and put a trap on a cat and take them giving them shelter... this cat sleeps in our garage... one winter night he or she was wailing out loud outside like maybe he or she was hungry. so we  opened our door and start feeding this kitty since then... and when this new black kitty eats i hold h. saya to show him that there is another one just like him in the feline world that exists, only in a different color :) 

the value of life is measured not in the amount of years lived but in the value we put into these years. some waste these years profoundly while others lived it like it is their last...

it's just sad that most revolved around money. money talks, money buy influence but not happiness. money this and that. money can even make one live in the best of places. one can travel, one can splurge in unimaginable luxury items... but what would you do if you're suddenly blessed with large amount of sum. maybe i can build a school and a recreational place for people with disabilities, help students with their tuition fees, advocate domestic help's issues, feed the hungry, clothe the poor. i can do a lot of things. then for me? i will build a shack in a beach and walk everyday. i can plant a bigger garden of fruit trees and vegetables and i can buy some art works and donate them accordingly :) see this is just me, how about you? maybe we can go to hawaii, to the vatican, to cebu? let's go! this is to my former high school classmates, laughs. but true, money talks and everything walks away from you when you don't have funding and the right amount of cash... but the greater truth is money is not everything. it can't beat and buy love :)

the beauty and the sadness of life

some enjoy life, some endure life, some suffer without end...

the intriguing subject of love... i know people fall in love in different stages in their lives. to the same generation or in may december affairs. it takes more effort to sustain a partnership when there are gaps in intelligence, age, society affiliations or financial concerns. i don't think a lot will survive these enormous challenges. few will but these are the exceptions to the rule. a proof that love conquers all when this happens... i agree with the dra. that being friends is the best option :) and let tomorrow decides their fate. see, in this case there is this thinking that you are depriving a person of their future to have a family. that is taking the high road. and as they say if you really love somebody you should always think of their well being, their future, their happiness... enough said...(^&*)... everyone grows old but love never do. eventually young people will turn gray but love won't. fake loves won't last but real love does. illusions are just smoky mirrors as true love is God's best gift to us. so good luck in finding that amazing love you all. it may take some time but keep on looking. for if it's there, hope you'll find it. then you're lucky. in the meantime be patient :) do whatever moves you as in racing, writing, being in films or in TV, and governing like our president :) gardening, singing, painting or whatever... you may not be successful in your pursuit of excellence, at least you've tried. so that should be good enough. the experience of being a part of any undertaking of your passion in any endeavour or race should make you happy but do not forget the trick. do it not for your own glory but for the glory of others :) that's the secret ingredient, win or lose, lose or win :>

whose glory is it for...

speaking of fun here is our president poking fun at the annual correspondent's dinner recently. very funny indeed :) true, whatever we do it should be a positive influence to those around us. whatever we do in life, in our career, in our hobbies, in our means of earning a living, that should impact our world. not in doing that because it is unusual. that task should make a change even only in a little way in other people's lives :) so you should not be venerated because you did it for yourself but you did it for others, other than yourself. and to those that look up after you because you are unusual then they and you should be in the same boat and would be a great partner in life, kudos! :) and the flower of happiness should be tulips second and powder puffs first for both are blooms that brighten even the most overcast days. i wish that i can cultivate a powder puff here but they thrive only in the tropics like in florida and the philippines... and one funny google search goes like this, "are limes unripe oranges?" that's very funny... limes are plain limes, like kalamansi are pure calamansi although it will turn yellow when ripe if i remember right and limes do not turn yellow when ripe. i tried to grow a bonsai lime, a bonsai banana but no luck, so i just gave up ;) and speaking of limes we have dayap in the province then which is similar to limes though bigger. we use it to squirt cooked shrimps if a kalamansi is not available... yum!

"Go home everyday, knowing you've touched some one's life"... in any form. in your career, in your hobby, in your travels, in your work... and that is life truly lived not for your own glory but for others :)

if you are given the power and the unique gift to be able to effect change that is an honor. that is very different from we change everyday for that is for ourselves. hope that the change in the health care delivery system here in the U.S. is a positive change for there are 2 opposing sides in a story as the truth is hidden somewhere. though at the end the truth will show its way :) for the good or otherwise... and if you serve and think of others you might just win a nobel peace prize like our president :)

According to the Norwegian Nobel Committee in Oslo, President Obama won the 2009 Nobel Peace Prize for his "extraordinary efforts to strengthen international diplomacy and cooperation between peoples... so if your sights is giving glory to others, it's karmic. that glory will turn back to you. i think it's the hidden and invisible law that goes like this... what you give is what you get, fair enough :) like nurses do it because it's their job but people give them glory anyway, laughs. oh well. but really thank you from the bottom of our hearts :> i could have been anything else but God gave me this profession so it's my calling. so i am just doing what i am called for, truly :) and it's mother's day. i asked JC what will be my gift today and this boy said, "less stress from me" ;) okay, i'll take it! :) for less stress the better, i'll live till my 100's then, i hope and pray :)...

beautiful dreamer

we dream, we hope and sometimes we fail
we stand up, we crawl
and we run to find
the reality of that dream

some have succeeded
to have conquered that dream
but sadly to some
it will end in defeat

but at least we have tried
we have fought and
we have given our all
as others played and joined in the game

who could have thought
that to dream is a game
played everyday of our lives
until our end

until we give up for there's no point
in fighting a losing battle
leaving in the process
are memories caught in a film...

canon, thank you... for you are a recorder, a maker and a keeper of dreams...

just like humans...

i will miss my red bud tree...i planted this red bud tree several years ago and it brought me beautiful flowers every spring for the past years. although named red it is really pink in color. it brought me happiness beyond measure but last year i think it was struck by lightning for its leaves started to die and i don't think it will ever bloom again... i saw several seedlings around my garden so i dug them up and replanted them in front and in the back of our house. it will be awhile till they bloom if they will live. hope they will... i miss my red bud tree esp. this time of year...

just like humans even trees will bid farewell

thank you for the memories
all of which are bright with cheers
clusters of pink buds and heart shaped leaves afterwards

thank you for the shade where the red cardinal rests
i will miss you but i'll let go for i can't have you
even all my tears dripped on my face

years and years of bloom are worth it even if you left
the pictures and the memories are all i have here, i'll take it
for that's nature where lightning hits and kills

everyone is a victim of death and farewells
humans, animals, plants and flowers are included
where to be alive means to die in a later date

you and me, every God creations
will bid goodbye at some point in our journey
lucky those that will make it longer to enjoy nature at its best...

reflections...

when you were born you thought that life is forever. you bragged about your looks, your books, your toys. when night falls you thought mornings will follow but you were wrong. it is just to some that the sun forgot to shine for the last time. since it wasn't you, it wasn't your home you never saw. that someday sooner or later the door won't open for you, the car won't run, the stars won't twinkle. it's not your fault but it's just the reality that you tried to ignore. a mere mortal human you don't own this world forever, king or pauper, dumb or genius, pretty or bland, sinner or saint. it's just the flow of the times, the unravelling of the universe. some are caught in its path sometimes more, sometimes less, sometimes at age 1 minute you're gone, other's at age 112 years. but more or less, it wasn't you who decided your fate. there is a God who with His infinite wisdom and for some reason or another He decided that it's time to go, it's time to leave and you could not do anything about it. what would you say to the birds that you failed to say thanks for their beautiful tweets. what would you say to the flowers that you did not notice their fragrances and their beautiful colors. what would you say to the world that you thought was mostly unkind, unloving, uncaring. some take drugs to numb their pain, they don't even have to do that. they just have to wait. for one day, one night, the pain would be gone, the roses will forget to bloom, the music will be silent for it's their time to depart. it is often ignored, mostly by the young that time ticks, sunrises will be lost, the taste buds won't work, that our mouths, yours, mine and theirs will be shut forever...

so what should we do? maybe to love more, be kinder to each other, be forgetful of the hurt, the pain that we caused each other. i know it is hard, but for all of these bounty and beauty of this universe that we are experiencing, the sunrises, the sunsets, the so called family and friends that we have, good or bad. our limited time on earth is not so bad after all, be it maybe long, short or in betweens. we say our thanks to our God who is kind enough to love us whoever we are, sinners or saints, young or old, pretty or bland, dumb or genius for it just make sense to enjoy the ride now for even how little our intelligence is, we should not ignore the fact that life will end, life is short, life is fleeting and that we don't own it forever. it is borrowed and we all have to return it someday. lucky those that will do it in more than 100 years... but it's not the age, it's the mark that you've etched and how will you be remembered that will define your footprints... long after all the music has been played, silence will win and by then it's too late to change... i hope that by then you did not forget to smell the roses and to enjoy the view... but for us who are still alive, now is the chance to wake up with a smile in our lips, hopes in our hearts, resolve in our minds. that we will enjoy this day to the fullest for maybe it is the last? we will never know. but based on those lives that came before us, life will end so what is better to do than accept this reality and enjoy life now, not tomorrow, no buts but now, no maybe but now, no procrastinating but now. thinking in hindsight that you could have done this a long time ago, right after that first disappointment hit, that failure, or lost loves... for you win by being positive and loving, you win by being forgiving and kind. you win by being aware that God is looking after all this time. always there, maybe wondering what beautiful creation would you give Him in exchange for making you alive once. will you be a disappointment or not... it's our call... ours alone and no one is to blame but us if we disappoint our God, although He will understand... thanking Him in spite of the pains of living is a good start :)

a stargazer lily

from my garden, one fine summer :)

the beauty of a flower
is life's sunshine
but like life it fades
when the time comes

few moments
few glorious moments that's all it has
to brighten our tired days
and very long dragging nights

God's wise decision
makes our heads spin
as the time ticks
as the clock unwinds

a new bloom comes spring time
a new leaf, a new blade of grass
but the same red cardinal
always tweets in my backyard...

spring is change and a new beginning like new years, easters and a new dawn. it is like knowing the part or time where you bow and exit. knowing the signs to a new way, a new road and a new path. it's like a long dragging goodbye, a long silent sigh, as you force your feet to make those foot steps thread slowly over those fine soft sand. one after another leaving your foot marks in the sand where the tide would erase it for eternity... no trace of you because that's how you like it... it reminds you of Albert Einstein who with his request was laid to rest in an unmarked grave. so humble of a genius. for he knew that the most important of all would already know...

a new beginning...

 

another page in a book

another song in a jukebox

another plane ride

another interest, another way

another break

another path

 another hope

in a million of stars

that you can't count

that you can't assemble into a garland

that you could ever wear...

image of a sunrise from the www and ms. dima's art called "easter celebration" thank you...

God will always provide...

 

if you believe and i do. my life is a testament to that... when all the games had ended and there's nothing more to play. when the day is done and the sun had cast its last ray for the day. here you are, always there on the cross reminding me to carry on. how faith directs your way to the light when your mind is clouded with doubts, hopelessness and gray. here you are... i will be numb if i don't understand that you gave your life for me. the least that i can do is to go on, be reminded that you are always with me, all along. all day, all night for all eternity. lucky me :) thank you... above art is the crucifixion by mantegna...

the meaning of death

is it the end or a new beginning
is it a stop or just a layover
death is when you close your eyes
for the last time and
you'll never wake up again

death is when your love ones
comes to your funeral in black
helpless, inconsolable, in tears
for they love you so much
and here you are cold and lifeless

when your journey is done
God will call you, old or young
life is just borrowed and when it's time
you don't have a choice other than to oblige
hang your hat on, bid your farewell if you can

say your thanks for the life that you've lived
very reluctantly for most but it must be done
for life is short, borrowed and never eternal
say your thanks for this beautiful earth
that you've been a part of, but most importantly...

give your thanks to God
for the joys and the tears
for the ups and the downs
for the ride, rough or smooth
for the days, sunny or gray

for life is the greatest gift that one can ever behold
in life you've experienced love and to be loved
in life you've learned to smile and to cry
and that sums it up folks
life is never everlasting

you'll give it back in the end like Jesus did
like you and me, all of us, when our time rings...

love defined...

 

Hatred paralyzes life; love releases it. Hatred confuses life; love harmonizes it. Hatred darkens life; love illumines it... Martin Luther King, Jr.

 

 

love is like a rose with thorns, it will spike your heart until it is forlorn. love is like a peppercorn, it is black and bitter when you ingest it without moderation. love is that concocted potion that's totally mesmerizing when worn. but when you wear it long, it neutralizes until it turns into a dreadful poison. love without respect and trust is like a friend who bites you in the back. love can only be a miracle when it comes from God and the heart. it makes us soar into the highest abyss of infinite bliss. it makes us think that life won't ever end. it makes our days turn into a glittering paradise where there is no pain, no suffering and no tears. because love is joy and happiness. love is all smiles and pinks. love is like a rainbow that is filled with magical display of colors. love is giving, hard sacrifice and understanding. but in the end... true love never change, never makes you cry, never ever plays, never hides and never cheats. plus it's always there for you and will show you to the world... that is the ultimate proof of true love, ladies. otherwise it is suspect in spite or whatever reason your love could come up with for not making it official :) so you better leave and find someone else, laughs. oh well... so this is my valentine entry...(^_~)... hope it's a good one, but really, nobody reads it anyway, so there you go :>

love that is hidden is false, love that is a pretension is a farce. love that can't come out is a lie, love that is all these is not magic. love that is like this is definitely a play... so make it a challenge to your love, prove it and let's come out in the open if your love is true and he's really worthy of your love :) another take of love on this coming month of hearts... there are so many kinds of love and it is so easy to give it if you think about it. be kind, put on your precious smile. pray and have respect for your fellow man. life is short, let's discard hate and embrace love :) i know it is easy to say but it's very hard to do...now maybe i can go for a really true blogging hiatus...blogging is like a smoking habit  i came to conclude. it is a habit that is hard to curtail, a real challenge. so if you win it, it is definitely a very joyous occasion...

God can open doors that no man can shut, and He can also close doors that no man can open! ...a quote to live by...

a colorful life...

as i turn back the years and reminisce, my life is filled with colors, less gray and black but more of the pinks, greens and reds... i was born in paco, manila at clinica lopez my mader said. did you know that amorsolo came from paco. this beloved filipino painter is a contradiction. his name meant one love but i think he had two wives, so there you go...

when i was young my favorite play is cooking time. with playmates, we used to murder the young gumamela leaves with a blade and cut them into slices for a gumamela leaves stew. i had no inkling that i am hurting the poor plant. now that i am a gardener in a lesser scale i really am not happy with that playtime. we lived in manila till i was six. when i was ready for elementary grades we went back to the province where rice fields are considered as wide gardens in my view. so for the next ten years in elementary and high school i am a farm girl who really did not do farm work but i am surrounded with chickens, goats, water buffalo, rice fields, trees and beautiful nature where our water supply comes from an inner spring well. very, very cool. we could have had a big farm and huge rice fields on my dad's side of the family but his dad my grandfather was sold with a fake illusion in the mindanao dream that is called the land of promise then. he sold the huge family land in exchange for a piece of the land of promise in mindanao. but lo and behold he was swindled and it is not true. they just took his money and gave him fake land title in mindanao. when he got there, there was no dream land. now all his children were left to fend for themselves...

well, i had a little brain if you must know, laughs. this might had helped me somehow in what will become my future life... i graduated valedictorian in the elementary grades and i had the highest grade point average in high school in that last grading period posted in that honor roll board out of more than 200 students divided in 4 sections. so after ten years in the province now i am 16 ready for college but with no money. here comes my mom's sister who cooks for a very rich spanish multi millionaire family in san lorenzo village in makati. i was told that if i can help her mop the floor, wash the dishes, prepare stuffs for cooking, clean our senorita's room and serve when their children ate lunch and dinner. so for a free place to stay while i take computer classes at manila data in cubao to be a computer programmer but that did not bode well. i am not a computer nerd. where are you steve jobs, then? so i stopped school and our senorita asked what happened. i told her that computer is not my thing. she asked me what would i like to take and i told her that i want to be a teacher which she did not like. she said that teachers, they don't make money which is a pity and then she suggested how about taking nursing at UST. and the rest is history. i am very blessed and very, very lucky...

so the poor, the middle class, and the very rich, i've seen them all... that made my life very colorful i think and gave me life's perspective. and now i live in the greatest country in the world... to be in what i am now i have to wake up early in the morning around 3 am to do school work. i have to do household help duties. so i sacrificed a lot... now it is time for me to live the life of my dreams... on the beach, on the farm with family, relatives and friends... in manila for a few weeks and in the states for the rest of the year. so i should be happy then you would think. but every now and then i am not for people look down on michael, my special, autistic boy and that makes me very, very sad and upset, but... when i think that michael is named after a saint that protects the kingdom of God from the devil, i smile :) we really do not know why our lives have its own twists and turns. sometimes you like the ride, other times you don't. but that is life with its spices of bitter and sweet... so we have to adjust to be able to survive...

God can open doors that no man can shut, and He can also close doors that no man can open! ... indeed :) ... if God wills it, it will happen for you as it did to me... thank you God :)

the holy family and friends...

 

taken by a cell phone camera 12-28- 2011 before new year then and a canon camera before the feast of the 3 kings, 1-04- 2013. same images, same place... i remember there was even a water feature or a pond surrounding it in prior years. you can hear the water drips then, very soothing...

tidbits, big pieces and puzzles...

"looks fade and dumb is forever" a recent quote that i've heard....so what is there to hang on to? love my friend, for if there is love that can't be bought btw you have it made...

the late steve jobs the former apple CEO was a very fascinating human being. what i like about him was that money did not changed him a bit, in the way he lived his life after all that billions. this was revealed in his authorized biography. so this book must be an interesting book to read. an adopted son with syrian decent who loves to tinker electronically, that is... and a college drop out but his genius mind changed our world no question. in how we hear music, in how we communicate to each other personally or in business. and that is huge...

overcoming the odds, where our president's life falls perfectly in place. what is there to do if everything is served to you on a silver platter. i think life is a real challenge to the rich than to the poor. why? for most people look up to the rich in respect for their high places in society and if you work in their company or business that adoration is freely given to you not truly earned. so it is superficial and we all know that...

the search for true happiness. it is hard if you are looking for it but it is easy when it is not your goal. just mix the perfect ingredient of being true, be always honest and be yourself. be accepting and be fun with limits. then voila! you've entered the happy zone :> plus happiness is what moves you. the beach to some, as love is to others. fame and beauty to you as sincerity and honesty to me even if you're a loser and a nobody, i'll take you :) see it is individualistic and it differs to each and everyone. like some may want their rice fried, while others boiled. i wonder what is better tasting, fried or boiled ;) yeah, yeah, yeah...it depends on what you eat it with. as there are partners that tick while there are others that don't so that's why we have divorces, separations and break ups, triple sad. but to sum it up, if you want happiness better be prepared to give it. that is the trick and the secret. my point of view btw and as we all know there are billions of us living on this planet earth, so that is just one take and i hope not to be considered of the dumb, laughs. oh well...

and my new year's resolution is to de-clutter this small house and do a general clean up project plus some backyard uprooting of plants... hmn, not an easy thing to do for i work full time. it meant that i will have to give up some rest time... that is very hard... but if there's a will there's a way... maybe a blogging hiatus will help as well, let's see...

in the meantime "talk is cheap but action speaks"...

gifts, visits and a new beginning

 

 

new year is new beginning

new path to a new life

new mornings are where new dreams

are made and planned

 

this visit is special

this visit is divine

this visit is one of a kind

for it is for a special holy child

 

a happy new year to all of us

let's give a gift to God

one gift that's from the heart

that has meaning that will last

 

joy to the world? how can we

after a gunman killed innocent children just days before christmas

it is hard to smile these days

joy to the world, we just can't

 

not unless we smile for just one second

when the shutter speed off once

the truth is it is easy to fake a smile

and no one will ever know that you heart is broken and torn apart

 

let them guess what's the truth

but only you knows what's up

so now we know that a smile is a curtain

which hides and stops what's inside

 

that's the ultimate illusion

a smile which is not

for better a fake smile than a pout

for who knows that a laugh might just comes out

 

but the true joy of christmas is Jesus

who holds the secrets of this life

we know that we live, we laugh, we die

and in between we grow up

 

we know that we care, we hate, we love

but beyond that we are at a blank

why are we here, where did we come from

still a lot of unanswered questions in our minds

 

in visits and in epiphanies

we come to open our eyes to who loves us

today, maybe tomorrow, for always?

truth is, love won't stay to some as love leaves us

 

but isn't it true that you'll soon realize their true value

when they're gone and had left you

now you will spend the rest of your days

in regrets, in amends and with hopes they're still in tune with you :)

 

our universe turns as days flip into nights

love is not true for it played into your heart

a playbook that will surely leads into defeat

as guitars will strum dark music instead of tunes that are lively and bright

 

and now who wants that...

 

gentle woman, quiet light...

a victim no more...

a whiff of wind had once gathered in my front lawn
perfumy sweet scent of the hyacinth in spring
and the fading roses at fall
i was taken, hypnotized and caught in a cage
where it seemed an eternity the night is too long
and all the stars are drawn

the nights had turned into dizzying days
as i was in a desert where water had left
the sand dunes are so hot my feet can't breath
prisoner of the wild tamed by the skies
when the rain had dripped the sky had opened up
releasing my chains from the dark and balmy nights

free at last to move on with the rain
somewhere along a river must be raging in
where i could paddle in life with my makeshift raft
navigating the mountains and the oceans so vast
my hands were able to row past and over the tide
as i reached the shore the beach is now in sight

welcoming me are the trees that can mesmerize
where the breeze is so sweet and the air is so calm
a new year indeed and a new hope in time
comes with it is a new shining path
freedom is great when your bondage is gone
relief is now what you see in your heart
dragging you into that forever shining light
for God is good and always, He's at our side :)

ART unsurpassed... wonderful paintings done by an all around artist named John Singer Sargent who lived a century ago. there will be no one else like him that can or will do the kind of art that he had done. it'll make your day busy for with all these artworks you'll need more than a day to browse and stay at awe at the brilliance of this man...

o holy night...

may the spirit and joy of Christmas be with us all...

and the night smiled...

it wasn't that it is balmy and bright
nor because of carols that we delight
it wasn't for relatives and friends that hover all
who drinks and dances with eager soles and shoes

and certainly not for the decorative fruitcake
and flickering xmas fir tree in the yard
it is because it's the birthday of Jesus, our saviour
and lord, the prince of peace and the son of God

our dear redeemer who suffered, died and
was crucified in that holy cross that is so divine
now is the time to reminisce and to give thanks
now is the time to express our unending love

for without our faith that guides us through thick and thin
without the holy trinity the bedrock of our faith
we are all then travelers without a map devoid of light
who will be lost and won't stand tall at the winds of turmoil...

per records kept the oldest woman on earth or the second? had just recently passed away at a whopping 116 years old. i wanna know her secret :> she should have kept a journal in the Internet where a lot of us has access so we know precisely what to do. and that will still be a lifetime for me if i can perfect her set records ...(^&*)... and now according to her 77 year old son, his mom was a teacher who minds her own business and gardens :) the reason of her longevity. maybe, but good genes and what you eat are also major factors. irene, my 70 year old RN co-worker has a mom who is turning 100 next year. she still lives alone and do volunteer work in the hospital. hmn, maybe she could beat the Guinness book of records. my mom is now 84 and still lucid and kicking :) she is very active and a vegetarian. my dad smoked and drunk which most males do in pinas, he died at 60. my rich spanish virgin mary look alike benefactor's husband died at 60 as well. everyday before dinner he drank frozen san miguel beers served in embroidered covered glass.

long years, long life, long journey

the stick must be so long
that it can reach the moon
the garden was always alive
making the roses swoon

every spring, summer and fall
through winter the leaves stuck
the green canopy of forever
made the birds sing and dance...